I was working with one of my clients today around some of the fundamental issues that concern many women.
At the moment she is dealing with her husband wanting to point score with her about many things, and he uses insults to win arguments, which results in her becoming silent. Unable to speak up, fearing annihilation if she speaks, she leaves the room. She went onto say that. . . . .
“Women are either ball-breakers” or they are seen as a “hysterical woman,’ meaning that women are either tough and unfeeling or totally emotional all the time.
I have been told that these expressions are used in the corporate world to put down women. This seems so unbalanced and untrue to me.
She further went on to say that if a man cries, for example, Bob Hawke in a television interview, he is immediately seen as compassionate vulnerable and caring, whilst if a woman cries in public, or at work she is labelled in many cases a hysterical maniac.
Another point that she made was that Lindy Chamberlain did not cry, as she was so desperately trying to hold it together and manage her emotions, and yet was labelled cold and unfeeling for not expressing her grief publicly, and then suspected of killing her baby for not behaving as she “should” have.
Yes, these are extreme examples. However, I am interested that so many women that I work with and know personally find it so difficult to speak up in their families, to their children, their partners, and in the work environment.
It feels like an epidemic. That the more that is expected of us all, both men and women, the more we juggle, and cram so much into our lives, with little time to reflect, discern and choose our responses, rather reacting to whatever comes our way in the way that will be the least disruptive.
This is where the rot sets in.
We skim over the surface of so much, rather than dealing with what is in front of us, we accommodate and make peace just to get through the day. And so it goes on.
Yet, I can feel that the tide is turning and I am firmly committed to helping women find a way to safely express themselves, to set boundaries and to believe that they are truly magnificent no matter what anyone else says. To be able to stand in their power, and respond to whatever comes their way with skill, compassion, wisdom and truth.
It feels incredibly scary if you’ve never done it before. However, the rewards are beyond measure. So what are the rewards I hear you say? Well, we win back our autonomy, peace of mind, real power and deep joy, self-confidence, truth and personal freedom. All that a Golden Woman needs for every season of her life. Who wouldn’t want this?